The virus has set up several road blocks on our journey. Though these are always difficult to overcome it has allowed us additional time and perspective. As the virus has continued to change our lives it was difficult to move forward with our process.
Especially during this time we started to feel that maybe the fit with the agency we initially selected wasn’t quite right. We didn’t feel as though we were valued or supported, maybe, more so it didn’t feel as personal as we had hoped. We received a suggestion of an agency to check out and immediately felt a stronger connection.
There were differences between the agencies, location, support, timeline and process. One of the things that felt good to us, was that this is a nation wide company, so infants from across the country become available. Though this means travel would be required and state regulations would apply it felt like a placement could be sooner. One of the things that initially terrified us was the fee schedule. Though it seems the cost is pretty comparable between agency to agency, this one seemed pretty rapid and daunting. At the time, I also wasn’t back to work so this was especially scary.
Over the last several months we had forced time to think about our path on this journey and somewhere along the line foster to adopt came across the table. It was always something I had thought about, but never something I was ready to consider, I thought I was 100% committed to infant adoption. But over this pandemic, it has forced us to look at every aspect of our lives with a different perspective. We have always discussed that we wanted to help, to make a difference in kids lives. We also have been open to more than one child so thought that we should do some research on the opportunity to take in a sibling group.
Finally, with research I found out how this process works in Florida and who to talk to. I had a conversation with the department about foster to adopt and adoption. Apparently, foster to adopt is not an option in the state, the end goal for all kids in foster care is to reunite them with family. This was not something we are interested in doing, we think it’s incredible that families can do this but it’s not a fit for us. Adoption is an option, but unfortunately the age range for adoption is 8 years and up. The only way we can even get on the list for adoption is being open to that range, which is also not a fit. We did learn that we could go on a wait list for a sibling pair with an age range of 3-12 years old. To me, this was almost devastating information to gather. You see, we want more kids in our family so bad and it seems as though every road has come to an end. We hear that there are all these kids out there that have terrible homes, that don’t have families but yet it seems impossible to get those kids.
So, this brings us back to infant adoption. We are literally back where we started, but the good news is that we are finally back on a path to move forward. Our neighbor recently said something to me and it was incredibly impactful with our journey, he said, “God provides us a compass, not a guide.” How true is this in life, we are pulled in a direction but we have to figure out how to get there. Wish us luck, we are jumping in with both feet!