Who knew when adopting a baby that you literally have to work with a marketing specialist to promote yourself. Though we realized we would need to create a profile we felt like we are pretty likable folks and many birth mothers would be attracted to what we offer. But this was a whole experience more in depth than we could have imagined.
After funds were received we were contacted by the marketing department with the guidelines of what needed to be provided. We were warned this was quite a process and also that we would likely need to take new photos which we were dreading! This was like receiving the most important school assignment of our lives.
We had to write a letter (500-700 words) to the birth mother. This is something that they say many of these mothers keep for their entire lives because it is a warm momento of the choice they made to give their baby a life they could not offer. This was probably the hardest for us to write. Because we don’t know the circumstance or anything about the birth mother or baby at this point it felt a bit forced.
Then there are the ‘paragraphs’ which each had to be 100-300 words. The required topics are as follows:
-Our home and neighborhood
-Our families and/or friends
-About us as a couple
-About each other
-Why we are choosing to adopt
Followed by up to 8 of their topics:
-Our promise to you
-What it means to us to adopt a child
-Our vacations and/or leisure time
-Adoption in our lives
-How we met
-How we spend a 3 day weekend
-What we will teach our children
-What we will tell our child about their birth mother
-What type of relationship we would like to build with the birth mother
-What attracted us to each other
-Our relationships with our parents
-When we picture ourselves holding your precious baby, these are our thoughts regarding their birth mother
-How a child will enrich our lives
-Why we chose our career paths
-What kind of parents we will be
-How we will discipline our child
For us some of these where impossible to fill out. We don’t know the situation the birth mother that will be reading this is in. If she is incarcerated the relationship will be different than if she is a college student trying to give her baby and herself a better life. Some of the topics we had already essentially tied into the required paragraphs so we felt it would be repetitive. Some of the categories we ended up consolidating into one.
We then had to provide a photo plan. This means that every topic we wrote about we had to have photos supporting or helping to tell the story. These photos were ideally supposed to have been taken within the last year, at max two years. With COVID taking over 2020 we stretched it a bit but we were very fortunate to have many photos that we could utilize.
Finally we had to select 10 lines out of a list of favorites and both answer them. Here are a few of our answers.
|Childhood Memory||Going camping as a kid up in the UP with family||Going on a 3-day horseback trip through the Superstition Mountains|
|Family Activity||Hiking/Traveling||Anything outdoors|
|Thing to Cook||Main Course/Center of Plate||Something special|
|Vacation Spot||Anywhere out west||Pacific Northwest|
We grow more excited as the days pass. We have started making some of the necessary purchases for the first steps of infancy such as some bottles, a car seat and bassinet. It is so hard not go to out and buy all of the things but we are taking this in stride. As much as we could have a call any day now with a perspective birth mother, it could also be months before a match is made.
If you are able to support financially here is our go fund me link. https://www.gofundme.com/f/vanbeukering-family-adoption?qid=a34239b5ee968bb3339effcba1935f80
If you have already supported or cannot at this time could you please help us by sharing our story?